| MPAA And RIAA Looking For Beta Testers The boys at the RIAA and MPAA have ordered us to put this advertisement up for them (don’t ask).
They are looking for men and women, preferably over the age of 18, to participate in a beta test of their new anti-piracy system. They plan to deploy this system in a couple months if all the testing is successful. They claim to believe that this will be their most effective solution to piracy ever; however, they warn that for this test, North America will be the primary area of interest, but they will also see if they can get European testers involved.
To participate in this test, you need to be in good health, have a PC and be willing to sign a waiver. They waiver can only be read after you sign it and we aren’t permitted to tell you exactly what it says, but it does indemnify RIAA and MPAA of any accidental damage they may cause during the testing, so good luck.
Now, you may ask, “How do I sign up for this test?” Well, it's fairly simple. All you have to do is to post in this forum, which will give the RIAA and MPAA your IP and location. They will then show up at your house and beat the living shit out of you. They will then proceed to smash your PC - and any other electronic in your house - into tiny little bits and they will do the same to your family, and friends. They warn that they are not liable for damages because, the second you posted in this forum, you in effect signed a waiver agreeing that you condone the destruction of personal property and physical assault.
This may not be the ideal forum to post in if you are a post-whore trying to raise ur post count
We do what we can to cooperate with anti-piracy measures to make everyone's life a little easier. Enjoy the beta test.
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screw p2p, USENET is the way to go |